Friday, 12 October 2012
Leave The Old
More than a year has passed since the boy left me. I awaited the year anniversary thinking that something magical might happen, some kind of feeling of freedom and over-it-ness might descend upon me. But instead it came and went without event. To explain; the six month break-up anniversary was magical, it was a day full of risk and adventure and I did feel a degree of freedom.
This date is now engrained in my memory and I doubt I'll forget it, though I always struggled to remember our anniversary or his birthday when we were together.
The fact that this date now brings with it no special feeling means, I guess, I mustn't let myself be ruled by it any longer. It's over.
In this year of hurt, loneliness, tears and at times, utter despair; I've grown. I went into the relationship a wide eyed girl in love and am now a women who, against the odds, still believes in love.
Saying that, I now refuse to live my life 'on hold' until the next love comes along. I will no longer entertain the thoughts of 'when I have a boyfriend....' or 'when I am married...' I will enjoy the many blessings in my life now, and take each day as it comes.
Now, with that year under my belt, I want to speak to all the girls, of whom I'm sure there are a few, who are on the same journey. I can't say when, or even if, another love will come along, but what I can say is that every day is better when we're enjoying what we do have, rather than mourning what we don't. So let's take stock of our blessings, however small, and continue to take hold of those opportunities that do come our way.
Artwork courtesy of Ruth Price.